Wednesday, December 15, 2010

So much for cupcakes.


See the above picture? This is further proof that my body hates being pregnant. My face is rebelling with some serious fucking acne and now, I find out that my pancreas has been flipping me the bird for a while. 

Luckily, I don't really have it too bad and I eat relatively healthy anyway so all I have to do is make some adjustments to my diet. Like setting a god damn alarm to eat stupid ass breakfast in the morning and eating at the same times every day, making sure to eat snacks inbetween meals, and poke my poor fingers to death. I also get to count carbs. Fun shit! Do you have any idea how hard it is to try and stay under a carb count for every meal when you're living in a hotel room and don't have a kitchen? There are all of 4 restaurants off post, two of them that serve heavy German food, a Kebab place that claims to have chicken but doesn't, and an Italian joint that doesn't believe in serving food without drowning it in a tub of salt first. I have gotten creative with the snacks I can eat in the hotel room but honestly, it is really hard to stay under the carb count for breakfast and the morning snack when you don't have a kitchen. 

And if Christopher gives me any more "helpful advice" about food, I am going to punch him in the god damn face. "I told you that you should have been eating that," "Remember what you said earlier about how much you could eat," "Why aren't you looking at the pamphlet to see what you can eat?"

OMFG. How about FUCK the pamphlet because unless I can shake the damn thing and food is going to magically fall out, THIS DOES NOT HELP ME FIGURE OUT WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO EAT AT 8:00AM when we have jack shit in this hotel room to eat that fits under the stupid carb count and the grocery store is closed!

I'm not even really annoyed with the Gestational Diabetes. I'm annoyed with fucking Captain Carbohydrate and his god damn annoying fucking advice!

I am tempted to shove an entire loaf of bread down his self righteous throat.

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