Monday, December 13, 2010

When the tables turn...

So, there is a coffee event for the Brigade spouses tomorrow night. Apparently this is a monthly thing. I hate these things. Seriously... what the fuck is the point?! The last thing I want to do is go sit at some coffee with a bunch of wives I don't know. Okay... our husbands work together. So?!?! This means I have to go somewhere with a bunch of women, sip on coffee, fake a smile, and pretend to give a shit about anything they have to say? And this is monthly?!?! WTF! I can't wait to use this baby as an excuse not to go to this kind of shit. And yes, I will use my baby as an excuse for all sorts of things.

Anyway, I've been telling Christopher that I don't want to go for the last two days. And I can tell he wants me to go. So this is how conversation at dinner goes:

Queen of the Universe: Christopher, you know I don't want to go to this thing but if you think I should go because you don't want to look like the guy with an asshole wife, I'll go.

Christopher: I'm not going to tell you that you have to go.

Queen of the Universe: But do you want me to go?

Christopher: *slight pause* Babe, I want you to WANT to go.

Queen of the Universe: *jaw drop*

Christopher: YES! SCORE! FIELD GOAL! TOUCHDOWN! *laugh of victory* I've been waiting for an opportunity to use that on you! How does it feel?! *happy dance*

I mean at this point, all I could do was hang my head and laugh. I've used that fucking line on him countless times and meant it... every time. It just sounds stupid as shit when it's repeated back to you.

Haaaaaaaaaaaaating him.


Chelsea said...

Haha! Honestly, I went to ONE spouse event and I swore I would NEVER go back. They do their book clubs and movie nights, and they stick in their precious little circles of friends, unwilling to let anyone new in. It's even worse when you're the youngest there (and some women have children my age), you're the only one pregnant (a few have infants, but they aren't about to let me near them because apparently being young means you break babies... Even though you've been a live-in nanny and babysitter for special needs children since age 11), you don't have kids in the playgroup or school... Oh and you don't go shopping with them and spend REDICULOUS amounts of money on things you don't need.

I have ZERO interest in that crap! I wouldn't feel bad for not going... I don't! Sure, I'm not "one of the cool people" but I don't give a flying fuck. I am happy rather than miserably dragging myself through another spouse's meeting. I MUCH prefer my husband's events, like when the whole group goes bowling or has a game night at Capt. Munshi's. The non-spouses in the group are SO MUCH nicer! They don't give a crap how old you are (or they don't know because they don't give you the third degree when you meet them the first time) or that you're young and pregnant. If you can joke around and play the games, they will accept you :)

Anyways.. That's my rambling. Don't go if you don't want to! Being nearly 34 weeks pregnant (you're only like 3 days behind me or something) is a GREAT excuse to use. You "just don't really feel up to bundling up and going out for the evening, because you're pretty uncomfortable at this point." They can't argue that! You're only 6 weeks from your due date for gracious sakes!

Keri said...

Military wives tend to fall in to two catagories: Hobags and Cookie-bakers. So generally, I don't attend unit events unless it's mandatory that one/both of us go. We just had our FRG Xmas party last week, and they made it mandatory to go in the middle of a snowstorm. Because nothing says family support like putting their lives at risk with bad roads.
If you're lucky, you will meet one normal person to be friends with in the unit, but in two years here at Drum, I have yet to find one.
Glamorous Army

T B said...

I avoid them at all costs too. I still haven't gone to one. I kind of just avoided this past one and never responded to the invite. lol. I love that they made your Christmas party mandatory. Nothing more fun than mandatory fun!

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